Simple Poultice for Minor Flesh Wounds

Whenever good Mr. Thoroughgood falls down the stairs, I run to the pantry and mix up a quick batch of my patented Simple Poultice for Minor Flesh Wounds (please note: not to be used on Major Flesh Wounds, non-Flesh Wounds whether Major or Minor, or accidental amputation).

Ingredients:
3 large eggs (beaten soundly)
1/4 tsp cumin
1/2 cup cool water
1 headache tablet
1/3 cup salmon paste

Grind headache tablet and combine with powdered cumin. Add eggs and mix thoroughly. In a separate bowl, combine water and salmon paste. Heat the salmon-water with a blowdryer for ten minutes, then combine with the rest of ingredients.

The result should resemble this drawing of tongue-in-aspic:



My husband loves this poultice and I know yours will too!